Carolina Integrative Psychotherapy, Inc.
  Carolina Integrative Psychotherapy DBT Family Skills
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  • Home
  • Dialectical Behavior Therapy
    • What is Dialectical Behavior Therapy?
    • Dialectical Behavior Therapy for Families
    • Dialectical Behavior Therapy for Couples
    • Resources for Families, Couples & Friends
    • Client Forms & Worksheets
    • Online Training Information
  • Upcoming Classes
  • Blogs
    • Blog: Head, Heart & Hands
    • Blog for Fellow Therapists
    • Recent Resources via Twitter
  • About John Mader
  • Contact & Request Information
  • Maps
  • Mindfulness in Clinical Practice and Daily Life
  • DBT Guided Mindfulness Practices
  • Coping with Covid Resources
  • CIP Good Faith Estimate Notice
DIALECTICAL BEHAVIOR THERAPY FOR COUPLES

In DBT Skills for Couples, we learn to more effectively cope with intense emotional patterns in our intimate relationships. These online classes teach skills that can help break the negative emotional patterns that prompt criticism, self-blame, or defensiveness. This class and the Family Skills Training provide family members, friends or partners with skills to better cope and support their loved ones. The  DBT Skills for Couples online class is scheduled each year in the fall and is typically followed by the DBT Family Skills Training.​

DBT Couples Skills Course

DBT Skills for Couples. DBT Skills for Couples provides perspectives and strategies to more effectively cope with intense emotional patterns and disagreements, to communicate accurately and with validation, and to deepen the intimacy we desire in our couple relationships.
The Registration link is at the end of this description.


Where/When: This 15-week series is held online on Tuesday evenings, 6:30-8:00pm. See schedule below. We continue to explore effective presentations of these skills and perspectives as an online course. 

A feature of the 2024 course:  
  • THREE Discussion/Skills Coaching Sessions during the course on Tuesday evenings. 
Learning Objectives: A description of the key learning objectives for each week of the DBT Skills for Couples can be found on this page: www.dbtfamilyskills.com/dialectical-behavior-therapy-for-couples.html
The DBT Skills for Couples course is based on Alan Fruzzetti’s The High Conflict Couple: A DBT Guide to Finding Peace, Intimacy and Validation. This will be the text for the course and can be purchased from many local bookstores or from New Harbinger at https://www.newharbinger.com/high-conflict-couple.  

Format: Members receive handouts and worksheets for each class. Every session begins with a mindfulness exercise, followed by a 15 minute Q&A to offer additional feedback/coaching by the group leader(s). We continue with the teaching and exercises for the new skills. This is the format of a class, rather than a therapy group which features interpersonal processing between group members or members of a family. The focus is on becoming more skillful, so you will be practicing with your partner. You will not be expected to share personal information.
This is a class, not therapy. Past participants have appreciated the benefit of also having their own couple/family/individual therapy while applying these DBT skills to the challenging events of the week. Participants tend to be diverse across a range of age, race, gender, therapy experience, and interpersonal styles/levels of struggle. All seek to learn, to become more skillful, and to actively apply the skills from each class. The class will be recorded and the recording will be available for additional study. An email summary of key points and additional resources will be sent each week. We understand there may be evenings when you will be unable to attend.   *This course is not a substitute for a standard DBT Skills Group, a support group, process-oriented group therapy, or couple therapy. We will be happy to suggest ways to find those resources.

Fall 2024 Schedule 

Sep 3, 2024 - Understanding Emotion in Relationships
Sep 10
, 202​4 - Accepting Your Partner (and Yourself)
Sep 1​7
, 202​4 - How to Stop Making Things Worse
Sep 2​4, 202​4 -  Small Group Discussion/Skills Coaching

Oct ​1, 202​4 - Being More Alive Together
Oct ​8, 202​4 - Healing and Reactivating Your Relationship
Oct 1​5, 202​4 - Accurate Expression via Emotion Regulation
Oct 2​2, 202​4 - 
Small Group Discussion/Skills Coaching  

Oct 3​0, 202​4 -  What and Why to Validate   
Nov ​5, 202​4 - 
 How to Validate your Partner
Nov 1​2, 202​4 -  Recovering from Invalidation
Nov ​19, 202​4 - Small Group Discussion/Skills Coaching    

Nov 2​6, 202​4 -  Managing Problems/Negotiating Solutions    
Dec ​3, 202​4 -  Transforming Conflict into Closeness   
Dec 1​0, 202​4 -  Pulling it All Together  

Cost: The fee for participating in this format of the online DBT Skills for Couples 15-week course is $850 for each couple. There is an Early Registration option of a single payment of $750, if sent with registration (reduced fee ends on August 16th if openings remain).  There are openings for 18 couples. Once the class is full, we will have a waiting list.
For those with limited financial resources, a reduced fee of $375 per couple, is available. We do not want the fee to be an obstacle to getting the skills you need (DBT therapists do strive to reinforce skillful asking), so please contact me if you need a further fee reduction to attend.​
The fee payment can be mailed to: CIP/Mader, 110 Circadian Way, Chapel Hill NC 27516 or 
paid using either PayPal with an additional 3% convenience fee to [email protected].
Complete your registration with the button below the following learning objectives.  


Key Learning Objectives for DBT Couples Skills Sessions

Session 1: Understanding Emotion Dysregulation 
  •  Wise Mind in Relationship: From Problem to Solution
Core Problem:
Highly aroused, negative emotions
…lead to harmful behaviors during conflict
…lead to unsupportive relating
And increased misery among partners

Potential Solution:
Learn skills to effectively manage negative emotions
…lead to increased understanding and validation
…lead to supportive relating
And increased joy (decreased suffering) among partners


Session 2: Mindfulness in Relationship
  • The Cycle of Invalidation
  • 3 Steps to Mindfully Observe and Describe
​Session 3: Interrupting Ineffective Behavior Patterns 
  •  To make things better, we need to stop making things worse...Here’s how

Session 4: Being Together with More Aliveness 
  •  “Reconditioning” a difficult situation so it triggers more effective emotional responses and intensity.   
Session 5: Reactivating Your Relationship
  • Next steps on how you can reinvigorate your relationship 

Session 6: Accurate Expression 
  • The Couple Two Step 
  • Mindfulness leads to Accurate Communication
Session 7: Validation: Whats and Whys 
  • Validation plus Accurate Expression equals Effective Communication 
  • What is Validation?
  • Validation is NOT…
  • Cycle of Validation 

Session 8: Validation: How Skills  
  • Mindfulness of Partner plus Listening Actively with D R L R

Session 9: Recovering from Invalidation 
  • Six Strategies to Break the Invalidation or Judging Cycle
  • Making Repairs after Invalidation   

Session 10: Managing Problems and Solutions
  • Managing problems = Negotiating Solutions when Possible 
  • and Accepting Problem Situations with Validation when Solutions are Elusive
  • Problem Analysis
  • Acceptance as an Alternative to Change 
  • Change: How to Negotiate Solutions or FENCE 

 Session 11: From Conflict to Closeness 
  • Finding Acceptance & Closeness
  • Behavioral Tolerance, Awareness of Unnecessary Suffering, and Letting Go of Suffering

Session 12: Summary, Review, and Celebration
  • Review the DBT Couple skills and strategies in light of your relationship priorities and goals
  • Discuss the most important skills that each couple wants to commit to practice
  • Trouble-shoot potential pitfalls with mini-treatment plans​
Online registration

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© Carolina Integrative Psychotherapy Inc., PC - 2025
​Chapel Hill & Carrboro, NC
​
Tel. 919.968.0231 x.1002
Follow @johncmader